School Sick?

Have you ever been homesick for a place that isn't your home?

I need to preface this post by clarifying something.

I AM SO HAPPY.

I love being at home.

I absolutely adore being with my family right now. 

I miss them when I'm gone.

And it is so good coming home from work and seeing them every day.

I am so happy to be working right now.

Both of my jobs are a blessing.

Working at DQ is familar and comfortable.

I know what I'm doing and I'm good at it. 

And my other job. 

Honestly, God answers prayers.

I told Heavenly Father I needed another job to earn enough for my mission.

I needed to not be making minimum wage.

I needed something slower than Dairy Queen.

I wanted it to be somewhere where I could help people more.

And the perfect job ended up falling into my lap.

I work with a 4 year old boy as a respite worker.

And I love it.

I also feel this sense of complete peace at being home. 

I don't want to be at SVU right now.

I don't want to be taking classes.

And as much as I love being an RA and DSO.

And as much as I love all of my friends.

And the campus.

And the warm weather.

I know I need to be home right now and that is so good.

But I still miss SVU.

The past few days have been hard as I've watched people return to school.

So here is a list of what I miss:

I miss Squad.

Squad is my lifelong best friends.

Believe me when I say they've seen me at my worst.

But they've also seen me at my best. 

And though our numbers keep receding as semesters go on.

(Sad picture without me)

I know we will always be there for each other.

I miss the RA's.

I loved being a Resident Advisor.

These crazy people mean so much to me. 

And shoutout to Reva and Cody-the best HRA's ever.

I miss soccer.

I MISS MY TEAM.

I miss Coaching Staff.

I miss Coaching Staff adventures.

I miss Coach.

I miss Facetiming home.

Not that really being with them isn't better but I still miss it.

I miss all of the SVU Student Activities.

And Institute Activities.

And even the dances.

I miss Sheetz Runs with friends. 

Because Sheetz is more than a gas station.

It's a lifestyle.

I miss my friends.

And our RA chats that turned into life chats.

I miss my room.

I just miss SVU ok?

And I promise I'll come back ;)

But until then follow me on my new blog

sisteratwood.blogspot.com

Calling the Qualified

Trials rock.

Trials also suck.

Let's just accept and embrace this two-edged sword we have to deal with. 

That trials make us stronger, better, kinder and bring us closer to God. 

But trials also bring us closer to Hell, or straight through it in some instances, more than we ever wanted to be.

I have experienced my fair share of trials.

I know the majority of my readers have felt those trials as well.

But I was brought to an interesting thought the other day.

God doesn't choose the qualified.

God qualifies the chosen.

Now at first glance that seems like something that would be nicely stitched on a piece of embroidery

Or a positive Sunday School message to lift up the spirits of those who are struggling. 

But beyond that cursory look and first thought there is a depth that warrants being studied. 

God doesn't choose the qualified. 

If He doesn't choose them than what are they doing?

They are already busy at work.

What these people are being chosen for is His work,

It is certain tasks that He needs done, 

Certain hearts He needs comforted,

Certain burdens He needs lifted.

And those who are qualified are already doing what they can.

They have been prepared and they are acting.

God qualifies the chosen. 

We are His children. 

We are His servants.

We are part of the last days and we are here to prepare the world. 

He has chosen us.

If you didn't know that yet, congratulations!

Now you know. 

And the whole, more knowledge=more responsibility thing means that now that you know you have a place to fill. 

Sorry to do that to you...

Not.

Anyways, we are chosen. 

And there are a lot of us out there,

And a lot of help that needs to be given. 

So while I am no prophet, and my thoughts are just my thoughts this is how I envision the qualified/chosen thing. 

The chosen are given trials to qualify them. 

But they aren't left alone in these trials.

There is the person going through the trial, or people.

There is the Holy Ghost there to comfort and guide.

There is the Savior, who lifts burdens, comforts and forgives when such things are asked for.

And then there are your daily angels.

These angels aren't of the winged variety.

Or even of the spiritual world kind.

These angels are the qualified.

They are those who've already endured their refiner's fire, or part of it at least.

They have been tested and tried and are qualified to deal with certain situations.

And so they are there for those chosen who are currently being qualified.

And they strengthen them.
They support them.

They uplift and inspire them. 

And the chosen goes through their trial and becomes qualified.

And the cycle begins again as they help another become qualified.

It is this whole circle, 

The circle of life if you decide to call it that. 

One of the greatest examples of this to me is mothers. 

Check out this talk by Jeffrey R. Holland. 

But there are so many people I consider to be angels in my life.

People who's personal experiences allowed them to help me through my trials. 

And through making my way through those trials I have been able to help others.

So just remember. 

Love.

Grow from the trials you have to face.

Accept God's hand in your life.

And thank the angels who have gotten you to where you are now.

How to Survive the Hardest Semester Ever

An Instructional Guide by Emma Atwood

So...

You are facing your hardest semester ever.

You begin doing everything you know you should be doing.
You were accepted to be an RA, and feel like this is exactly where you should be right now.

You are still the DSO for the Women's Soccer Team and love it.

You were offered to be the DSO of the Men's Soccer Team and have accepted that position as well.

You know that there is a lot ahead of you this semester so you take only 12 credits. 

Everything feels perfect.

July 30th you realize you have to be at the airport TONIGHT, not tomorrow night.

You hurriedly finish packing and hug your family goodbye as you leave for the airport.

Maybe this is the moment that threw off your entire semester?
Eh... 

Not sure about that yet.

However, with minimal delays you arrive back at school and all is well.

You fall asleep at 6 am that first day back, and wake up at 11 am.

Not the best start but it will have to do since you couldn't fall asleep all night.

The first weeks are filled with RA training and new adventures.

Soccer begins and looks promising.

Students start arriving and, slightly overwhelmed you work to get them all moved in. 

Good start.

Then classes begin.

And you feel totally and completely unprepared...

From day 1 you feel behind. 

Maybe this is when it all went wrong?

Your netflix account hasn't seen any action since the beginning of August.

You are busy all day every day and it feels fantastic. 

You asked to be released from your job as DSO of the men's soccer team because you aren't giving enough time to the other things in your life.

You think that will help. 

However, schoolwork is now put last. 

You scramble just to keep current on your assignments.

Soccer starts becoming emotionally exhausting.

Time goes on.

Soccer ends and you think now you will have all this extra time.

Nope.

That time is filled with other, equally as important things.

You are floundering. 

You become further and further behind and it becomes a struggle to even attend classes.

You get sick. 

Is this the moment when you should have given up on your semester?

Not yet.

Earlier on in the semester you realized that God likes you out of your comfort zone.

You learn your lesson in that regard.

You accept that being out of your comfort zone is good.

But did you realize that not succeeding is also WAY outside your comfort zone?

Because it is...

You learn lots of life lessons.

(For example, how big 8 24 inch pizzas are...)

Your testimony grows substantially. 

You have a desire to receive your endowments and attend the temple.

Then you realize you are supposed to leave on a mission. 

Wait what?

Planning begins.
You find replacements for your jobs. 

You tell your friends and family. 

You talk to your bishop and start your papers.

Finally...

You have waited so long to go on a mission and the time is NOW!

But now doesn't exactly work into your plans.

Oh well.

You trust God's timing.

The semester draws to a close.

You aren't ready to leave your friends, your life, all the good things that are finally all perfect and working and are all you've ever wanted.

You aren't ready at all.

You cry more than you are willing to ever admit. 

You get a blessing of comfort and then, then you realize lesson 2 of this semester.

You can't do it alone.

Yes I can!

No. You. Can't.

You recognize that while you are amazing and have been given many gifts and talents,

You can't do everything all by yourself.

The load on your back isn't supposed to be carried alone.

Too late in the semester you give it up.

You ask for help.

You admit you are weak.

And maybe you cry some more.

Because as much as you love what you do.

As much as you are doing what you know you are supposed to be doing.

All those things weren't meant to be done alone. 

You recognize all the times you have hit the bottom, 

Asked for help and been lifted up,

Only to turn around and fall again.

You need help.

The semester is almost over.

It is Finals Week.

And you, you are exhausted.

Your heart is broken.

And your spirit is contrite.

And ye shall offer for a sacrifice unto me a broken heart and a contrite spirit. And whoso cometh unto me with a broken heart and a contrite spirit, him will I baptize with fire and with the Holy Ghost...

3 Nephi 9:20

You finally understand that scripture and what that feels like and what it means. 

And you realize you are not alone. 

That you've never been alone.

It could be so much worse.

You are grateful and promise to do better.

And you trust.

(Tender Mercy= Sam coming to visit)

Some lessons come easier than others.

Some involve failing a class and barely surviving a semester.

Some involve losing loved ones, being injured, mental or physical disabilities and a host of other pains.

But there is a lesson. 

And there is peace to be found. 

Peace I leave with you, my peace I give unto you: not as the world giveth, give I unto you. 

Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid.

John 14:27

Life isn't supposed to be perfect.

Even when you are doing your best that isn't always enough.

That is what the atonement is for.

Christ meets us at the point that we can't continue on.

Wherever our best is, He will go and take it the rest of the way.

I've learned that this semester.

And God loves us.
He loves His children.

Even when we feel like we are failing and falling short.

He loves.
And we need to appreciate the good moments.

The friends.

The laughter.

Enjoy the journey.

And that is the third and hopefully final lesson of this semester.

Outside My Comfort Zone

This age I'm at now is the age where the most important decisions of my life are being made.

Right here.

Right now.

That is intimidating to think about. 

The church leaders have said this before but my most poignant memory of this was in 2014 when Elder Jeffrey R. Holland came and spoke to the youth in Southern Alberta.

He told us the ten years of like 14-24 were where our most crucial decisions would be made and the course of our lives would more or less be set...

No big deal or anything. 

Well right now I am smack-dab in the middle of that.

19 years old.

Old enough to be on a mission.

Old enough to have married friends. 

Old enough to have declared a major (Politics) and be applying for internships. 

Old enough to be living and working in Virginia. 

Old enough to be over a group of 30 girls ensuring their safety and security.

Old enough to be booking hotel rooms and meals for my soccer team.

Old enough to be doing a pretty good impression of an adult. 

Old enough to have said goodbye to my comfort zone for probably forever, with the understanding that who God wants me to be and knows I can be is not the girl who could read all day long in her room. 

God has a great vision for who I can be.

Somedays I get glimpses of the woman.

A woman who is strong and brave.

A woman who is compassionate and loving.

A woman who keeps her covenants and is forever progressing. 

A woman who will do whatever God asks of her, and is led far from her home and far from her plan of how her life should go. 

A woman who's goal is celestial. 

So what is, right now, the greatest lesson I am learning?

God likes me outside my comfort zone. 

BAM. 

That is it. Right there. A 7 word sentence. 

One that grips my heart and fills me with anxiety.

And yet has taught me the greatest lessons and filled me with the greatest peace.

He LOVES when I'm outside my comfort zone because that is when I grow.

 I have done so much growing in the past few months, and have been pushed into situations and responsibilities that I have not asked for, but are what God would have me do.

 And I have learned so much. 

I know that through this I am becoming the person God wants me to be. 

Another super important lesson I am learning?

The gospel isn't easy.

Being a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints is not easy. 

It is progression.

It is about rejecting the natural man. 

It is about the spirit training the physical body to be in harmony with eternal principles.

It is about a higher law.

A path that is strait and narrow.

I love the Lord.

And I love this gospel.

And I love the person I am becoming.

Because she is someone who will move mountains. 

She is someone with unlimited potential.

Because she is someone who will do whatever the Lord requires. 

(With minimal resistance and complaining I am sure)

And she is me.